Thursday, May 14, 2009

Stupid Pervasive Annoying Mischief

Mercury, perceived to be spinning backwards, straddles the fence between Taurus and Gemini, creating an odd energy across the monetary/technology cusp. Ebay, Amazon...all shopping online should be carefully considered for there is a great possibility for mixup and mayhem. Mercury is, after all, a trickster planet and when retrograde, anything can happen.

Today, I opened my email to see that a new person had commented on the Guestbook on my website: Imagine my surprise to see the following message:

Interested in Brunette celebritys? Right place for it! [and proceeded to list a website]

Besides the obvious spelling error (shudder), who in the world thought to spam a guestbook? I had no idea that this spamdemic had reached the guestbook world. Can you imagine if this happened in the physical world? You're at a wedding and you look down at the guestbook to see that someone had written a note inviting the bride and groom to visit a site that boasts shemale pornography. Unless that's a theme of the wedding (and seriously, what flowers would go with that theme?), most would consider it highly inappropriate.

"But Jared," you say, "your website is hardly a wedding. It's barely an event, let alone a formalized black-tie affair." Well, reader, you're right. Though hardly the momentous occasion that heralds the incipience of matrimonial bliss (can you think of a more cumbersome way to describe a wedding ceremony?), my website is dear to me and holds great importance in my mind. After all, it's a way for me to communicate an aspect of my being in the form of a novel, which, by the way, has absolutely nothing to do with brunette women with extra appendages (just in case you were wondering).

Curious, I decided to take a look at that infamous "spam" folder in my various email accounts. Within one email, I had pharmacy news (i don't take any medication, although those of you reading my blog probably think i should; member enlargement pills (yeah, thanks for the self-esteem blow) that brag about the pleasure I'll be able to give a woman (check the demographic); an ad to lose weight (again, thanks for the therapy session); and the offer of a relationship from someone named Wendy who claims to be the best thing that could ever happen to me.

It pervades other areas. Twitter has it (in fact, spam has its own profile - Myspace has it. Some would consider the numerous quizzes that are found on Facebook to be spam. Even cell phones have spam nowadays. I've received calls from phone numbers that I didn't know and I let them go to voicemail and it's just gibberish. It's amazing to think that spam has moved in and shares a common law marriage with technology.

Ah, but it started long before that. Remember chain letters? That's old school spam. Not even emailed chain letters (although those are a high annoyance as well); snail mail chains. "Count the number of letters in your last name. You must send this letter to that many people within the number of days that equals number of letters in your first name or else you will ripped apart by a purple bear in an overcoat." Oh, please. Like the real chain letters were any less ridiculous? At least Internet spam is ecofriendly.

Bottom line: Spam is annoyingly pervasive and seems unavoidable.

Or perhaps it's just Mercury's sense of humor.


  1. haha! great blog Jared! Really enjoying reading it, will link you. Am going to check out your website too. best wishes x

  2. Thanks, Barbara! So glad you stopped by. Looking forward to your next post. :)